By Ling Sing Lin
Watching a Channel 8 sitcom re-run, where a student studying in a music school was repeatedly bullied by classmates, till she committed suicide, inspired this post.
What causes Bullying Behaviour?
This is when there is an imbalance of physical or social power. The perpetrator could be physically bigger or comes from a wealthy and influential background. Many bullies are themselves bullied at home or at school, and this learnt behavior, plus their sense of entitlement and superiority, lack of compassion, impulse control and social skills, and low empathy, make them enjoy inflicting cruelty to others.
If he is envious of another individual, for example, if the other person is better looking or better in studies, he may resort to bullying. He can also pick on those with weight problems, or are nerdy or strange looking, to make himself feel better.
Emotional Bullying
This is threatening behaviour, shouting and calling names. It can happen within families, with a parent bullying a child, or spousal emotional abuse.
Cyberbullying
This is bullying that takes place over digital devices. It includes sending or sharing negative harmful, false or mean content about someone else, to cause embarrassment or humiliation. Such contents can be viewed by strangers as well as acquaintances.
Not only is this form of bullying hurtful, it can have long term consequences, as a permanent public record can be created on line (an on-line reputation), which can be accessible to schools, employers, clubs, etc, who may research the individual, now an in the future.
Consequences of Bullying
Bullying is traumatic, and can leave lasting scars. If nobody comes to your rescue, the victim can lose trust from repeated bullying. He can develop low self esteem and bouts of anger in later life. There can even be post traumatic stress disorder and long term psychological damage, and development of personality disorders.
Some people suffer from depression and even commit suicide.
Pre-emptive Measures
Parents should develop a close relationship with their children when they are young, so that the children will confide in parents when bullied. Parents should then take action to stop the bullying.
It is not possible to stop bullying completely. But parental examples of civic-minded behaviour and kindness to all, will be good models for children to follow.
lingsinglin
Dr Ling Sing Lin is a medical doctor by training. She worked in MOH HQ for many years, in policy making and administrative positions, until her retirement.
